Friends,
It’s hard to believe it’s already time for the food drive in honor of Bill’s birthday. I’ll explain more about what we are doing for that in a minute, but I wanted to take some time to update you on how things are going here. I know there are some people who aren’t on Facebook who ask from time to time how things are going, and since I haven’t had time to really write, I thought this would be a good opportunity. I’m not even sure where to start, except to say that we continue to be thankful for the amazing village we have been blessed with. Things have been very overwhelming lately, and I truly wouldn’t be standing if it were not for the people who continue to encourage and walk alongside us. I keep thinking that four years into “life without Bill” should mean that things are easier… but just when I feel like one “fire” is starting to burn itself out, another one pops up. Out of respect for the “Peas” privacy, I will just say that one of them is really, REALLY struggling. I mean, if I’m being honest, each one of them struggles at different times and to different degrees, but one of them is really having a hard time right now. And I am having a hard time knowing how best to help her. I’m not going to lie. Being the only parent and not knowing if I’m making the right decisions is very overwhelming. Everything rests on my shoulders… for all three of them. (And yes, my amazing Christian friends, I know that ultimately I need to give it over to God… and I have, but I am still the one that has to make and carry through on the decisions about school, friends, appointments, homework, activities, etc…) The weight of it all has gotten very heavy. It is impossibly hard to watch your child struggle and not be able to fix it. I’ve actually gotten used to the littles crying for Daddy. It happens almost every day, so I’ve had to become numb to it. I’ve had to uncomfortably apologize when one of the Peas asked a friend’s dad if she could call him “Daddy.” I’ve had to compartmentalize the “Why are we the only ones without dads?" and Why didn’t God want us to have a daddy who was alive like everyone else” questions after the girls go to Daddy/ Kid events with the amazing men who love them in Bill’s place. And I have had to accept that all of these things have become part of our normal life. But when something out of the blue pops up that causes one of them to struggle, it is really hard. They’ve already had to endure so much, I just want things to be easy or at least “less hard” for them. And maybe I want things to be “less hard” for me too. Bill was my rock. He made me feel safe. When I felt overwhelmed or scared he could hold me tight and I would know that things would be ok. It’s a really lonely place to be having to do this all on my own. And it’s exhausting. I feel like I am constantly fighting. And I'm tired of fighting. So, if you are a person of prayer, I would really appreciate you praying for us. For strength, endurance, wisdom, and peace. I keep reminding myself that everything is temporary and that God has it, but it’s still really hard.
Because I try really hard to focus on the positives, though, I thought I would share a few of the highlights as of late. This year, Leah has been dancing her little heart out on her studio’s competition team. And next year, Zoey thinks she might like to try it. Leah and I have had two special weekends away together for her competitions which was really cool (thank you to the friends and family that watched the other two). Zoey is a total ham and has recently decided she wants to go on American Ninja Warrior (ha!). Kaleigh is now THIRTEEN… enough said. J She continues to be a tender-hearted, bookworm just like her Daddy.
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| Ready for the Daddy/Daughter Dance with Mr. Dave and his awesome girls |
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| Leah before her first dance competition |
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| Casting Crowns concert in Richmond |
And speaking of her Daddy, today would have been his 44th birthday. So, in honor of the day that gave us Bill, we are kicking off our annual food drive in his honor. The girls look forward to this every year, and they are super excited this year because we are focusing on providing snacks for the kids at the elementary school that our church supports-which means kids their age will be benefitting from the food drive. Bill would be so honored to know that children in need will be provided for in his memory. So if you feel so inclined, please feel free to donate anything from the list below. Please note that items should be individually wrapped so the snacks can be distributed to students.
Our address is 26028 Pembrooke Circle, Chantilly VA 20152. We will be collecting items until May 10th.
Oh- and here's a link to the video from the girls and some friends gathering and delivering the items you were so generous to donate last year!
Thank you so much!
Love, Dana and the Peas
Guilford Elementary School Snack Donation List
** All items should come in individual packs
Go Go Squeeze Apple Sauce
Granola Bars (no nuts or peanut butter)
Goldfish
Fruit Snacks
Pretzels
Kraft Crackers ‘n Cheese
Animal Crackers
Cheeze Its
Veggie Straws
Pirate Booty
